Saw this sign in the subway the other day. It reminded me of me…..

So.  Here we are.   I’m now at the next hospital.  It’s Sunday, August 19th.  I believe the ambulance trek to this hospital is when I have faint memories of being an Egyptian Princess on a caravan.  I remember feeling like Russell Crowe in Gladiator when he was dying. He was floating across the desert going toward the light.  I have odd memories of being on a caravan, with Meggin nearby speaking into my ear.  However, I also have odd memories, more like dreams, of being in excruciating pain.  Terrible, terrible pain.  I believe this must have been the headache I was complaining about all weekend in Dr. Gold Shit’s hospital.

But now I’m at the new hospital.  And Kamil has called her father, who made some calls and determined who would be a good doctor for me — now that we knew I was maybe going to die from my brain bleeding.  The new doctor was Dr. Jared Knopman.  He deserves to be named, because he is quite good at his job.  He performed all of my four brain surgeries.  My mother also had a crush on him…..  I remember that my friends and my mother thought he was a hottie.  I also remember being mad at him for putting Gretchen into my head and for not letting me have a glass of rose in the ICU.  I think I was not an easy patient.  Apparently, I tried to escape a few times.  I have no recollection of that — but I do think Kamil was on watch when I was found down the hall trying to leave the premises.

When they finally determined that I was bleeding in my head, Cris called my parents, who immediately jumped on a plane and headed to New York.  They designated medical decisions to my brother, who while they were in flight, authorized that they could drill a hole into my skull.  Which they did.  I think that relieves the pressure from the bleeding. Honestly, I really have no clue.  I don’t remember any of this. Remember — my first real memory after getting a headache on Friday night, is waking up on Monday with Fucker crying at my bedside.

So my friends anxiously awaited my parents arrival on Sunday night while I was getting my head drilled into.  More friends were there by now.  If I weren’t dying, it would have been a nice party group I think.  A lot of good ones were there.

When my parents arrived, I think someone helped them get to my apartment, where they stayed while I was under hospital care. And I believe someone also bought them some food.  (Meggin, I think. Or maybe Brian.  Anyway, thank you to both.)  I’m sure my parents weren’t in the best of shape, knowing I was, well, dying maybe.  I honestly, do not know more about the next few days other than I had the brain procedure that you get when your brain is full of blood.  Then I had something called vasospasms.  I don’t know. Google them. They’re scary. And I had them. And that’s why I had to have more surgeries.  Vasospasms can kill you too.  They’re even more dangerous than the actual aneurysm.  I think.  Honestly, I wish I knew more.  This is all stuff that everyone has told me at least 100 times, but I forget every single time they tell me.  It’s so weird to think that there is this huge chunk of time that is just mostly a blank canvas of weirdness that I can never seem to get straight.  And it was really super scary and stressful for my family and friends.

There are lots of other things I will tell you about this experience and this hospital.  But I will end tonight with saying that in my drugged induced, blood-in-the-brain stupor, that I did manage to email David Frei from the Westminster Dog Show.  Because ever since Uno the beagle won the show way back in the day, David has been a friend of mine and of Snoopy.  Anyway, I emailed David and asked him to bring his therapy dogs to visit me. And he did.  A few times.  The ICU made an exception and let animals in….   Here’s a photo of me with a tube in my head — but happy with a show dog.  As you know, I love furries.  And this furry was so sweet!  (That’s my dad with his iPad in the background by the way.)

Namaste and best to all you pet owners out there….